LifeLesson #32 Tuesday June 13, 2006

World Cup Links for the day:

First – An article about the token white guy on the Trinidad & Tobago team. I was transfixed on this guy during the Sweden Match. It’s like watching the legendary Columbian defender with his huge afro [By the way his name was Carlos Valderrama) ] or a Portuguese player with bleach blonde hair. He has the one of these things just doesn’t belong here vibe.

Second – For a prison colony, it’s interesting to note that not a single phone booth was set a blaze after Australia’s mammoth upset over Japan.

So Yesterday, I was lucky enough to be stuck in a waiting room which was showing game 3 of the Oiler-Canes Series. I caught a majority of the first period surrounded by 10 or so Oilers fans. When the Oilers opened the scoring I dropped a silent F-bomb and punched the air when the Canes tied it up. But that was the extent of my celebration. No boisterous cheer. No Victory arms. Unfortunately, I really had to suppress my reactions. It wasn’t the number of Oilers fans that I feared; it was the demographics in the waiting room.

See, I learned years ago to never heckle a group of 7-10 year old. Drunken males, not a problem! Third Base Coaches, they love it! But never heckle Kids! You’re bound to lose and you’re not going to come out on top.

Plus, Kid logic is unbeatable! Their taunting can be relentless. An “Oilers Suck, Canes blow” from a ten year old always defeats a longwinded explanation of why Brind’Amour’s name should be engraved on the cup by a 26 year old any day. Plus a chorus of kids spitting insults at you in the middle of a quiet waiting room is never a pretty situation. There’s no positive way out. (Unless you start throwing punches and that’s just a little messy) Plus if you do manage to defeat them and make one of them cry, you’ll end up getting socked in the face by a furious parent or worse you’ll have to deal with the wrath of an unimpressed girlfriend.

Moral of this Life Lesson; when surrounded by 8-10 ravenous 10 year olds suppress your heckling instincts. Wait until you’re leaving the waiting room, step back in to the office, kick open the door and the let out a loud “OILER SUCK! CANES RULE!” Then run, like a little girl.

Categories: The-Flames, The-2006-World-Cup,

Commenting is closed for this article.