Tormenting Adolescents Monday July 17, 2006

So Dooce wrote about an incident involving kids and wasabi which just slayed me. It reminded me of that little deviant side of my personality, which loves to torment adolescent teenagers. Come to think of it, it’s probably the sole reason why any offspring I produce will need months of therapy once they grow-up. It’s not that I’m mean individual, I just get a kick out of screwing with fragile minds of our youth.

I remember back in the day, when I was a certified university drop out and full time Subway Sandwich artist, some twelve year old decided he’d be a know it all. He ordered a meatball sub, no vegetables, gobs of mayo and numerous annoying questions.

“Hey, how much do you make?”, “Do you like your job?”, “Do you have a Girlfriend?”, “Have you ever kissed a Girl?”, “How Do you become a Sandwich Artist?”

Anyways, while making his sub he asked for salt. I asked him how much and with a snarky little grin he replied “As much as possible! ” I asked him if he was sure. He reassured me that’s what he wanted, so I unscrewed the salt container and layered his meatball sub with like a fresh snowfall. I wrapped it up and handed it back to him. Then I watched as the kid choked down 1/5th of my creation, moments before racing to the bathroom to introduce my salty delight to the toilet. After realizing it would be impossible to eat the sub, he came back and ordered a new meatball sub, this time without salt.

Ohh, the memories.

Categories: The-Past, The-Personnal, The Blogosphere, The Humourous


Does the salt incident reign supreme? What about getting drunk slop-tarts to help mop the restaurant in exchange for stale cookies?
Few people I know care more about tormenting adolescents – when confronted with drunk teenage girls, Connor takes advantage of them by GETTING THEM TO MOP FLOORS. Legendary.

Jamie · Jul 19, 03:01 pm · #permalink


Oh man, how could I ever forget that night. Yeah, that one overshadows the salt incident. For the record those girls did a crappy job of mopping my floors.

cturner · Jul 20, 08:42 am · #permalink

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